Journal Entry 1 (Tally)

I don’t find it fair that now just because Shay ran away to live her own life I have to suffer for her not being here. On the day of my operation to finally become pretty I get taken to a special circumstance section and met Dr. Cable. She instructed me that the only way to get pretty is to find Shay and bring her in. Why am I chosen to find her? And it’s totally cruel to leave me ugly just because of my friend. She is responsible for her own actions and I’m not the boss of her.  My only chance was to agree to find her and somehow convince her to come back. I had to say yes or my pretty dreams were down the drain. The doctor then handed me a tracer to activate when I found her. I don’t know if this is the greatest idea, but for now it’s my only hope.  

                As for the moment, the only clue I have to finding Tally is rhyming note she left me before taking off.  I hope she hasn’t gotten herself in some trouble like I have.  It still is so difficult to understand why I suffer from her choice to be who she wants. I believe there is a secret or something the pretties are hiding from us. I don’t want to make the wrong choice about who I am and who I want to be.

                I feel confused about what Shay has been doing. I don’t know if I should help her make the right choice or if I should leave her to live her life without being pretty.  Becoming pretty has been my dream ever since I was a little girl. I look up to them and I feel like I want to be a part of their group and not feel left out. I remember that day when Shay was in my room and I wanted to help her choose what she would become when she turned pretty. Her comments were “See this is what they want to do. They just want to make us feel bad about ourselves” I find their being nothing wrong with becoming pretty. What could possibly be wrong!? They have fun all the time, everybody is beautiful, you live in nice mansions and everybody is your friend. I remember that moment when I visited Peris and felt awkward and different. I never want to feel that again. I want to feel happy, free and accepted. Prettytown was just magical that night and being a part of it all just made me feel happy. 

                 I plan on trying to figure out the clues Shay left me and head out on my journey to becoming beautiful. If I can just find her and convince her that Pretty is the way to go my entire life would change for the better. I feel like for once I would feel accomplished and glad of who I am.  I do not want to be discriminated and on a lower rank than pretties.  I want to be Pretty, now!